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Current Music:Outkast - I'll Call Before I Come
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Subject:Who Else?
Time:01:08 am
Current Mood:hopefulhopeful
The usual guy with the usual questions...

How long did it take the people here to get over their first significant relationship?

I'm at about 7 months and not doing too well, was wondering what I had to gauge it against...
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Subject:So I did it...
Time:11:10 pm
Current Mood:dorkydorky
Okay I called him tonight and I'm afraid I sounded like a complete DORK!! I called asked is blank there and he was like yeah its me. So, I said hey it's Robin how are you? He was like good I told him where I got him number from and he was like oh that's cool. The conversation went something like his.

Me: So, what are you up to
Him: Just hanging out and you.
Me: OH I just got done watching my niece's and nephew
then some small talk about how my nephew is the devils spawn.
Me: I just wanted to let you know that I had a good time hanging out with you the other night.
Him: Yeah so did I, I had fun too it was a good time.
Me: So, I was just wondering if you would want to hang out again sometime.
Him: Well, I really don't do much during the week.
Me: Well, neither do I but that is cool I meant on the weekends or something.
Him: Yeah that would work.
Me: Okay sounds good I just wanted to put it out there that I would like to get together again.
Him: I'll give you a call.
Me: Okay then well, I'll let you go and talk to you later.
Then we said bye and hung up the phone.

I just feel like a dork!!!
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Subject:News on the call
Time:10:55 pm
Current Mood:weirdweird
Just to let every one know who made a comment, I did it!! Okay not all the way but close enough, I have his number. My friend who I got it from was like okay sure no problem. I was like I just feel kind of weird and he was like no don't worry about it so that made me feel good and more relaxed about doing it. So, now tomorrow I figure I will call him, I think it might be too late right now. If I had to call him now I think I would be able to no problem. I know tomorrow I am going to freak a little I'm afraid I might get tongue tied... That happens to me once in a while so I'm just worried it will happen tomorrow and I will sound like a big dork. All of this relationship stuff is kind of new for me. I was in a relationship for about 10 years and the guy actually made the first move. Then after him and I ended I have had two other boyfriends that ended as you might have already been able to tell since I have my sights on someone else. The thing is they are the ones that made the first move as well. I guess my thing is my self esteeme is not all that good. It is when I know 100% someone is interested and it seems like yeah this guy is but I begin to think what if it was just a fluke. What if it was just the moment and I'm afraid that I will embarrass myself. I hate feeling this way sometimes I just feel like I am not worth it or why would someone be interested in me. Then I have people assuring me that I am a good person and they say I am pretty and have nice curves and all this and that but it is so hard for me to believe them. It is a very long story of why my self esteem is to this point. I am happy to say though I have brought it up quite a bit in the last year.

Okay I'm sorry I just had to get that out... I didn't mean to ramble.
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Subject:I'm new here
Time:06:22 pm
Okay so yeah I am new here I just found this today and I had to post because i have a question. So, this past weekend I went to a party and seen this guy who I have not seen in around 2 years. It was really cool to see him I was so happy and he was happy to see me. He kept telling how good I looked and this and that. Very nice of him to be saying those things. Well, him and I ended up staying up all night and hanging out, he was telling me I was cute and giving me little kisses on my cheek every now and then. We were tickling each other and you know just basic flirting. Well, when we were talking we both found out that we love The Lord of the Rings, both of us have already gone and seen Return of the King but we said we would like to see it again and the idea was passed around that we should go and see it together. Okay cool I'm digging it. Well, morning came and he ended up falling asleep around 10 a.m. the person who I went there with who was my ride woke up and wanted to leave so we did around 11. The guy who I was talking too all night was fast asleep and I didn't want to wake him but the problem is I didn't get him number!! I'm so freaking dumb!! So, I have this other friend who has his number but I feel stupid about calling him and asking him for the other guys number then I would have to call the guy I'm interested in because I will have his number and I don't know what to say. I just don't know if I should get his number or not and if I do should I call him and I don't know...
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Current Music:Dr. Dog - Swamp Livin'
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Subject:Radio Shack
Time:08:22 pm
Current Mood:curiouscurious
I've got questions. You've got answers.

Sorry for the cheese. On to stuff:

How do you know if a girl wants you to kiss her? This isn't like a pressing matter right now, but I've had trouble with it before. So, for future reference I guess.
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Current Music:Sergei Rachmaninov - 2nd Piano Concerto - mvt. 1
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Subject:Passing Thoughts
Time:12:45 pm
Current Mood:contemplativecontemplative
I don't know why, but on the long walk back across campus to my car, I was thinking of relationships. Particularly my current stance on them. ;) So figured I'd share. Go on, run screaming in panicked disarray. :p

I generally like relationships. As least, non-psychotic ones. But I notice that I have to actively focus harder on my other goals when I'm in a relationship, and that is not cool. I put quite a bit effort into them, but as I look back, I think I probably need to keep things in perspective while in one. And that's not easy. It's all too easy to get sidetracked, like with college and moving, when I'm thinking about someone else and not just me. And I think that's part of the reason I don't really care for a relationship right now. I want to get certain things done, and I want to stay as determined as I can, and I'm not the greatest at keeping the relationship bit and the college / goals bit separated. So instead of trying to work on it right now, and possibly stretch college out even longer in the process, I want to just put it all aside.

As a side note, I've spent the past three years at a community college, which I enrolled in right after high school. As it is, I probably won't get into the architecture department right away at School of Choice, but I still think I can transfer. Which means I'll have to spend another year before I get into my actual major. Then four years after that, because I've only just declared my major, and have no work done in it.. And they have a very strict program anyway, so, yeah. It'll be 8 years. Granted, I'm not viewing it as a waste because of what I've learned about myself and in Gen. Ed. classes, but much more time spent beyond this would seem like a waste to me..

So, with all this in mind as I was walking to the car, I thought, "Well, gee, I'll be 26 when I graduate if I keep on my current track. That's fine, I'll be able to work on the whole relationship deal after that." Though it is possible and pretty likely that I WILL be involved in another relationship before then, I really want to stick to my guns about graduating, and if I feel I can't handle both commitments, I've already made up my mind which one's getting the cut. Which I suppose is a pretty asshole-ish way of putting it, but I finally feel like I know what -I- want to do, and now I want to go get it done.

However, with that being said, I might end up finding someone who understands this completely and is willing to smack me upside the head whenever I start to veer off course. So it's not like this is all etched in stone, despite how it may sound. :p That's just me putting thoughts into words. ;)
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Current Music:U2 - "Love is Blindness"
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Subject:A revelation
Time:04:16 pm
Current Mood:goodgood
Cross-posted to my own journal

I am a dumbass. No, this isn’t more of the same unprovoked self-deprecating bullshit I usually write in this thing. I say this because it’s true. When I have things in my life that are simply too spectacular for words, I doubt them constantly and search until I find a reason why they won’t last. If I had to hazard a guess as to how much time I’ve spent doing this in my current relationship, I’d put it somewhere close to 80% (sorry, Dan). It wasn’t until last night that it occurred to me to ask the man – point blank – the question that’s been burning in my mind since Day One. It wouldn’t be prudent of me to share the question with you, Dear Readers, but suffice it to say that it was a serious one. It’s one that could’ve saved me a whole heap of worry if I had just asked it when it occurred to me. But no… instead of doing the smart thing, I made an assumption about him. That was unfair and, as I learned last night, inaccurate. We were in the midst of (yet another) deep discussion (they’re always deep) and something clicked. I realized almost mid-sentence what it was that’s been bothering me all this time, so I put it to him in the form of a rhetorical question and had my fears allayed immediately by his answer. In that moment, I felt about three inches tall. “I owe you a gigantic apology, then,” I said. “I assumed [this thing I won’t name here], and that was wrong. I’m sorry.” He just looked at me without much facial expression at all. I grabbed his hand and for the first time since we’ve been together, I felt pretty damned safe in this. I mean, I know nothing in life is certain, but there are things that we should feel good about. Things that give us absolutely no reason to feel otherwise. This, my friends, is one of those things. So I’m going to follow the advice I gave to him, and (in his words) “the edict we had from the start”: I’m just going with it. You’ve seen it here before, Sports Fans, and you’ll probably see it again. But what’s different is that for the very first time in any relationship I’ve ever had, I’m growing with someone. Sure – there have been a few snags along the way, but we’re working through them in a more constructive manner than I’ve ever experienced in any aspect of my life. I feel so… I dunno – balanced, and dare I say… happy.

The moral of this story is this: If something’s bothering you, just get it out there. Don’t skirt the issues, don’t mince words. You’ll spare yourself AND your loved ones lots of unnecessary grief. Thanks for playing.
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Current Music:Outkast - Take Off Your Cool
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Subject:Opinions, please
Time:06:30 pm
Current Mood:anxiousanxious
Ok, do you guys think you can know for sure that you will NEVER love someone?

Back Story: I'm getting over my last breakup slowly but surely, and beginning to accept that it's over. I was talking with the X about it - when we broke up initially, she thought it was possible we could get back together - and she says it's over for eternity. In other words, there's no way she will ever love me. I don't think she can possibly know that, but I'm incredibly biased. If she can change one way, she can change another I would think.

So, from your own experience, do you think it's possible that she knows for sure that she'll never love me? If so, why? If not, why not? Etc.
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Current Music:Cursive - The Ugly Organ
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Subject:I think I need some understandin'
Time:10:34 pm
Current Mood:crankycranky
I just don't get it at all. Someone help me out, please. Why do people break up when BOTH people still like each other? And I mean, not because of a fight or something. I mean, something that seems to come out of the blue. And not because of long distance either - that's a whole 'nother topic for me. Maybe later.

If you're breaking up with someone, and it hurts, why are you doing it? This isn't an accusation, as much as it may sound like it. I just don't get it.

I guess it's specific to the relationship and everything and there is no answer. It seems like that's been happening alot lately - having to accept there is no answer to LOTS of the questions out there.

Anyway...if you DO have answers, or just anything, you know what to do.
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Current Music:Panthers kicking the Eagles' asses.
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Time:08:20 pm
Current Mood:anxiousanxious
I know that I just broke up with him, and I know that, given the situation I'm in (with hating Collierville and being depressed here...I'm moving, and he's stable here, basically), it's best if we remain not-together...

Damn. I miss him. Even when we're in the same room, I miss him.

I need to keep telling myself it's for the best. As much as it hurts, it's for the best.
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[icon] The Datetarded
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